Pages Navigation Menu

"No matter where you go, there you are."

Advert

Noah: The Super-duper Abridged Script

Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblrmail

Noah-Abridged

Nobody has time to see a two hour film these days; add up the time spent travelling, waiting in annoying queues and sitting through thirty dastardly minutes of adverts and trailers and that’s your whole Sunday! That’s why every week I’ll bring you a condensed version of a recent cinema or DVD release. It’s like the Cliff Notes of cinemagoing!

This week I abbreviate: Noah. Brace yourself for juvenile language and spoilers galore!

EXT. OUTSIDE - RAINY SEASON
THREE TEENAGERS try to get laid whilst their dad, EVAN BAXTER builds A BOAT to spend 
his retirement on the seas with his WIFE AND PETS. Elsewhere ANTHONY HOPKINS looks 
for some tasty berries.
DARREN ARONOVSKY
We done? You cool?
RUSSELL CROWE
Yup.
CGI
Yup.
STUDIO EXECS
Yup.


THE END... OR, THE BEGINNING

@sjbowron

Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblrmail

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Amazon Prime Free Trial